Sunday, January 28, 2007

A Diamond is a Diamond, A Stone a Stone, But a Man's Not All Good nor All Bad, Call Them As You See Them

Body, Mind and Heart

That's the theme of this posting, the catalyst is the my buddy looking inside, and my observations. This kinda stuff is what I like to read, often I think, is it good to 'expose' yourself in this manner, and my gut feeling is......The system is watching you as it is, you may as well use it as a mechanism for self discovery. In reality, few people 'bite' on subject matter like this, and below, a possible explanation why.

I see too many couples struggling to make it to zero, or the fight to stay afloat - which obviously leads to detachment, and doesn't allow for positive victories for where it counts in your soul. I always wonder what is the distinct reasons in the minds of others who struggle, most can be hand picked from a standard list of human elements, what shocks me is that these sorts of people know their own hands hold them back, and justify the reasons of their actions, relying on 'feelings, and the heart.'

People need other people, I'm often asked about settling down and all that stuff, and simply put, I say, I'd rather be alone than with the wrong person. Since I've been 'alone,' I'm able to cultivate close relationships with family and friends, while still be able to be 'available' for the right person. People who know me could say I look a bit too much into these things, and I say the same thing over and over again, but the beauty is in the subtle details.

I used to think with the heart, just as Ben Folds said he used to be a 'sentimental guy,' and here is an explanation of why it hasn't worked and probably never will work for me in the future. The heart can be mislead, the heart can fall victim of 'love' endorphins (which fade over time), the heart breaks and drama and sweatpants phase usually follow. I've been thru the ringer with the 'follow your heart' cliche as it applies to human emotion, and I chose not to go that route again.

One may look at this and think, how sad, but the contrary is actually the truth. The mind doesn't lead your soul into dark alleys of fools vultures and undertakers, unless you ARE a fool, vulture or undertaker. Your mind should be that pit bull you keep in the backyard to keep the 'terrorists' out of your house.

A connection of the mind and body is only possible if both 'participants' have reached that state of mind of comfort with their own body and soul. It's a strong bind which bears no confusion, no indifference, certainly no drama, but it carries understanding, respect, and enlightenment. I know what I'm missing, and I know what I'm holding out for, it's really easy the way I see it.

This a package deal, and the heart will tag along, a person's mind holds the lasting key to someone's heart, and over time, this endeavour is much more fulfilling and will keep you from becoming a statistic.

Shame on me for shunning destiny and things like this, however human beings are means to an end, and serve an individual purpose. If you believe this, there's many ways to get from point A to point B as it pertains to this stuff, it's a matter of cognitive individual choice, and the more you use the head on your shoulders, the better off.


nathan said...

the process of independence - freeing others from the slavery to your emptiness and need. i'm empty i need you, you're empty you need me. we call that love, we call that relationship. when you free another from that kind of soft tiernny, maybe that is love. when you look like you're becoming independent, i don't back it up. i step back, and if you fall, you fall. but i will not become your prop so that you can live in a state of mind without a distinct identity, without an achieved personality. because then i'm contravening the holy spirit. and when you see me doing it, you likewise warn me. and when we do that, we have a healthy relationship. we are each other's mirror and we are also each other's teacher. perhaps when you are no longer emotionally affected negatively or positively by what any other person does, says or thinks about you then you can love in the true sense without guilt, shame, control or distrust.

been awhile, how's it going robert?

Ashley said...

ahhhh yes, i agree with you on this to some extent. it's far better to be alone, free, and independent than wasting yours and someone else's time if that someone else is all wrong for you. i have tried both approaches.... following your heart vs. being rational, sensible, and using your head is an internal battle that i'm sure a lot of people have fought. you'd like to think that your mind could never lead you astray, but the fact is that it just isn't that easy. being with someone that's a "logical mate" seems smart, but what happens when the heart doesn't "tag along"? and trust me, you can't make it do anything even though you'd like to think you have control over it. you just have to take your chanes with finding a balance between what's logical and what "feels right". additionally you can't allow yourself to take a nosedive...leap with ferver, but be sure to open your parachute as to land gracefully if your mate doesn't break your fall.