Monday, January 01, 2007

When In Doubt, F*ck the World, Forget all the Things You've Heard

Well, Steve will probably be the first to tell you that my blog has suffered from content this year, as opposed to 2005. There are several reasons for this lack of rock n' roll lifestyle, which I can explain later, but first the highs and the lows.

First high is 'keeping the blog going.' Damn, its hard to keep something like this up and runnin', main reason is you're are scrutinized by all the critics, life overlaps, and it's hard to stay relevant and somewhat captivating (even for myself as I write) in the context of life and all the personalities involved in life.

Travel, well it's been a good year for some trips. I was fortunate enough to take a hop across the pond to Germany to witness back to back epic gigs of The Babyshambles and The Divine Comedy. I was able to head out to LA to see Belle and Sebastian with the LA Philharmonic, and The Shins opening for them. I was able to make a Turkey Day out of Roswell and other Land of Enchantment touristy sites. A nice slingshot trip to the chocolate city for a best bud's bachlor party.

Speaking of that, Manuelabor and Lacinator deserve a paragraph in and of itself, they put it into words better than me, but for lack of sentimentality, it's very special.

I've had the opportunity to get to know my two Round Rock nephews, their cool personalities, and a glimpse of what it's like to have kids, and it's not all that bad, but for me, not anytime soon if ever.

On the flip of that, I've diverted back to the life as a vagabond. The long story short, couch hopping, and finding solace with that wonderful sister of mine. Pink Floyd gets it right when they say 'when I come home cold and tired, it's good to warm my bones beside the fire.'

Why the lack of content on the blog? Well perhaps the biggest reason, other than the travelling, the drama, inner demons, character attacks, (and what seems to be leading down a self-victimization, which I hate, thus I'll stop)...is, the PM* program, and damn I had to study quite a bit for that thing, I actually went 'back to school' for a while, and personally I hate academia, ol' Rhett says it best, 'You don't learn anything, you're just waitin' around.'

Looking back at Dec 05, holy sh*t, I seemed to be a tormented kid, and I recall exactly how I was feeling, what I was thinking, just one of those 'healing' times in life, where I had to think thru things, and yes, I'd be lying if I wouldn't admit that most of the turbulence was my sentiments about a girl. I never shrugged, but have put things into perspective, and thru my own process I've made lemonade out of lemons.

I recall a comment a buddy made on one of these posts earlier, and he said to just keep everything into perspective, and know what you are getting into, and accepting it for what it is, and don't think things will ever drastically change. This gem of wisdom finally stuck with me, and that's something that is going to carry over with me into the new year. This applies to life, love, work, people, war, all these things.

The Diz has been the backbone for 2007, I applaud and respect his rationality and together-ness, and damn, I can't wait to be like that one day soon.

2007 holds a lot of interesting challenges for me, I'll be getting a new job, I'll be trying to save for a trip to Japan, I'll be looking at the whole human element with a tad bit more hesitation, and I hope to go to a billion or so shows, even though the back is giving out, and I'm officially not a 20-something anymore.

Thanks for all the perspective this year from everyone, thanks for the tough love and love love, and I look forward to making another year of not as cynical happiness in 2008!

Time for a Tylenol, time for bed.

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