Monday, June 29, 2009

OO, This Feeling Is Wonderful, Don't You Ever Turn it Off --

evilution happens to everything, including twitter, in 140-whatever characters -- i boast i got an account the first day it opened at the dreaded sxsw interactive festival, my evolution of twitter is --

1 - saying what i had for lunch
2 - talking about all the cool things i've done
3 - talk about all the cool things i've done, and also aggrigating tidbits on life, love and links

certainly MOST, not all individuals who don't use it for facts and figures dine at the FEAST of EGO, in an UNPERSONAL BARREN WASTELAND WHERE NO ONE CARES! --

That's why after the buzzfactor is going, its not a viable business option, because its impersonal, and biz-ness these days is all about personal interaction. 10,000 or so people now see the 'great idea' from the iconoclast of choice, so hence, the idea isn't the science, the personal interaction is the new hotness.

Why do I think so, b/c no one in the TWITisphere seems to care about that, they're all overexerted to the bone, trying to do more, see more, act more, feel more, MORE MORE MORE --

It's not sustainable in the environment, and its not sustainable to one's soul --

Scoble says it best, when actual work was being done, not the exploitation of work -- and I cut and past --


Drama vs. Helpfulness, how I will rebuild a friendship

by Robert Scoble on June 29, 2009

Twitter. It almost means drama. Heck, for those who didn’t catch musician and Perez Hilton going at it over on Twitter you can get a whif of the kind of things that seem to happen in our real-time entertainment-focused world.

I have drunk too much from that world.

It’s too easy to be nasty. To build alliances, mobs, and use them to hurt people. I know, I’ve been on both the receiving end of that and the giving end of it too.

But I’m going the other way. How can I be helpful?

Yesterday I reminisced about the good old days, when coders ruled the world, not drama. Code isn’t dramatic. It either works, or it doesn’t.

Code doesn’t incite riots. Code doesn’t call people names. Code doesn’t end friendships.

So, I’m leaving the drama world to those who want to use Twitter to riot, to harm, to hurt, or to cause a fight to encourage people to click on their links so they can get the page views and get paid.

Tonight a friend says he’s ending his friendship with me. I don’t care how or why, but I’ll work to be helpful again. I used to be helpful.

I used to help by being excited by seeing the coolest latest startups. I used to help by trying out all the latest technology and knowing more about how to use it than anyone else.

That is still there, but it’s been repressed by the real time world. The drama. The fights.

My friend is noticing the same thing, although he’s articulating it badly. So am I.
It takes two to fight, so now I’m off. How to be helpful?

Well, for one, have you tried Feedly? I’m playing with it and it is now my favorite way to read

Google Reader’s feeds and tell the world about who has the best blogs. Yeah, it only works with Firefox, but most of you should be using that anyway. Would love to help out.

Anyway, earlier today I wrote that with every tweet we have a choice: helpful or hurtful. I’m trying to be helpful. Kick me if I’m not.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

i never really thought it would be like this, i know its kinda hard but i'm glad that it is --

idealism has always had a tendancy to bring out the best of the worst of me, today that tug of war rages on --

ever since i learned the expression 'when you point a finger, six get pointed back at you' -- i've made earnest effort to sit back, take 27 deep breaths, take what i think are the shortcomings in others, internalize and reflect on myself the mental notes i've taken of others.

often times i wonder, does that introspection and self enrichment pay off? i think 'what percentage of the population is trying to improve themselves, and what percentage increase are they doing to achieve 'better ground' .5, 5, 15 or 50% --

squandered talent KILLS ME being a c student in high school, passing college by a gray nose hair, and generally speaking working harder than the next fella, often times a lot harder --

squandered time is relative, damn if i'm not finding myself apathetic more often than not the last few weeks, there's an invisible to me mountain i'm pushing against emotionally, one of two things will happen 1- the moutain will reaveal itself to me, or 2 - i'm like hmmm, this just got easier, what happened --

i'm searching for answer one, so i don't have to climb that mountain again --

i'm finding its a great thing to have expections of people, but finding it difficult to factor that in the living a extraordinary life effortlessly.

lately my thoughts lack a central theme, i hate it when i read stuff that i can't derive a central them from as much as i hate watching movies like 'snatch' --

undertones will tell the tale of my past to me, or good stories for people that are close to me -- stories that i don't have trouble articulating --

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

two butterflies tie knots in his stomach they love it when he goes too fast

wind whistles past round oceans of air that will mess up his hair though he no longer cares anymore --

wow, perpetual bad mood only is illeviated by thoughts of --- wow, what's neil hannon doing now, what is the gang from belle and sebastian doing in glasgow, how bout billy bragg, or sondre lerche -- guess they've never been to iraq, i don't think we'll see them on a moral tour here anytime soon.

the heat is UNF*#@%&^ING believeable, this sentiment coming from a native Texas boy -- not to mention the dust, wow, man vs. all sorts of things out here.

onion layers continue to peel off, it's a good thing -- its like the soul's 'fat suite' comes right off -- binge drinking comes to mind --

only two months in, i know coming back i'm going to have a hard time 'adjusting' to civilization. i'm going to see inefficiency everywhere i go, from the showers to the commutes, to the apathy seen in peoples faces, and the general lack of care and consideration for your fellow human.

i keep talks back home short, its great to see and hear friends and family. there are some folks here that never truly accepted they are here, i've come to accept that i'm here for a good while, and i'm having a good go at it.

two nights ago, after a few hours in the heat, i'm laying in bed, cold room, and my body temp is off -- throw on the cover for 30 seconds and i'm hot -- i will have to do something for my poor feet soon too. :(

as we inject some capitalism into this nation, here's a quote from stalin of mother russia, maybe my friends would stop calling me a communist one day if i quite quoting brutal dictators --

“The people who cast the votes don't decide an election, the people who count the votes do.”

wow, just re-read this, i'm all over the place -- need to recollect

Monday, June 22, 2009

You kept running, You Got Money You Got Fame, Every Morning, I See Your Picture from the Train

Its not about having the right answers, but rather asking the right questions. My question has always been, 'how do you develop unconventional talents in a conventional world?'

-- haven't done it in my magical armchair
-- not in the pubs or on dates
-- not by hanging around people with the same mindset
-- not by knowing everything about everything or wanting to learn everything about anything
-- not even by tuning in to the emerging social scenes online

what's done more for me than all of that in just two months

-- going somewhere where most have guns
-- seeing post apocalyptic vehicles in real life and not just on mad max
-- tied to the plow 84 hours a week
-- hearing the sound of islam 500 yards away and going....'huh?, what is that?'

what i've found is a hard balance between judgement and perception --

-- why does it take moving to the desert to see a right wingers perspective on war?

-- why does it take moving a right winger to watch a polar ice cap fall off to convince climate change --

What I can do back home to be unconventional

-- listen to others
-- know where to take the conversation after inception
-- don't talk passionately about 1/2 of 1 percent of the picture

the world has some problems while we lament on

-- who to blame for it
-- how to sell it
-- the best way to stay distracted

Right now I think back to a moment in time, what was going on in my head when I was living in Queen Bee's basement, and Belle and Sebastian's The Life Pursuit album hit the torrents -- O how the times have changed.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

And all my senses seem to shine through the day, honey that's okay Yes all my senses seem to shine in the night, honey that's alright

A buddy said what you'll experience on a deployment, 'youll never been happy, sadder, pissed on, pissed off, tired, energetic, etc' in your life, -- I'd say there's a lot of truth to that. Lately is hysterical laughter, the kind that only comes with 42 straight 12 or so hour days.

Random Thoughts --

Things that will change when I get back home (will cross reference in 6 months)

-- will be EXTREMELY happy to see the family

-- change my 20% lazy time to 2% lazy time

-- really work out some tough arrangements on the guitar

-- stay in super shape, eat right'ish

Trancendental Thoughts --

-- if everyone had at least 25k invested in common stock in America (not 401k, etc), there'd be a totally different perception of the economy, market forces and how pub debates are framed. the more you look the more ick' is revealed. classic enslavement that's been going on since the advent of trade.

-- every time i see a mention of tribal bs political talk I gremace. rome burned, the track we're on we're heading to the same fate, same as it ever was

-- oil enslaves us, 'recoveries' are blocked due to the price of oil, and my thoughts, american hedge funds try to drive up the price while opec tries to keep it down -- i'm trying to wrap my head around that one.

-- growth at the expense of mother nature suggests her nudging us off the planet, sustainibility will require A-BOMB project type coordination times 100, I'm ready. i understand what's good for water skiing isn't good for snow skiing, but there's something looming.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Tonight I throw myself into, and out of the red, out of her head she sang

tonight i get the 'twitter and social networking is stupid' tongue and cheek speech. although i think social networking is just a tool (garbage in and garbage out), it is a world flattener.

there's some iraqi officials on twitter, and i can say @yodude here's what i think about the world situation. in a nutshell that's a potential game changer.....if ---

people actually listen -- the key now isn't the idea, or listening, its execution, timing, vision and luck. good ideas are being given and consumed by so many people at this day and age, the part that you can control of a success equation is how bad you want it -- and from what my inclinations show me, people don't want much, they just talk a good game.

to this day i've never really 'wanted anything' bad enough to GRIND it out -- i desperately want to have something to sink my teeth into, until then its calculated decisions about where my life and career are going.

lately i've been thinking, i'm a fan of globalization WITHOUT growth. i think about what awareness does to the fertility rate, sustainability and repair (for instance, how long is that plastic smoothie cup going to stay in this man made lake, and how long is the lake going to be around?), and the true keys to the kingdom and happiness --

i've been thinking about how tired 'conventional war' is, and what's next on the horizon....clone wars, etc, etc --

i've been thinking about the hideous and sensationalist 'socialism' debate and how people get caught up in this. could it be that one day we're all so efficient we can cocoon in our chu's and have what we want on demand free of charge and free from work?

i've been thinking about how i want my stock to go up, so i can live on the interest earned --

i've been thinking about a hammock in the back yard in shiner, a really good one, laying in it all day and reading --

i've been thinking how i spend my days back home, and boy are there going to be some changes when i get back --

Friday, June 12, 2009

I'm an Outlaw, I Make my Livin' on the Run, My Life is Lonely, But I was born to Need No One

The desert is small, seeing points of reference from back home can make your disposition do a complete 180 --

Calvanism, a suggestion, something I've always been afraid to approach, but I think here's the time and the place for it -- According to wiki, its The system is best known for its doctrines of predestination and total depravity.

Another tool to make sense of a different reality, why not grind your brain against it.

To balance

Firehouse, the 80's band I've been jammin' back to back to back nights on my jog. After this jaunt through the depths of knowing thyself and self actualization, I hope to end back up at Firehouse, for as if the laws of economics say 'mo money mo problems,' a deep dip into the brain grunge certainly hinders happiness.

Yes, I'm saying it, one day I think I'm just going to like shit with a beat, but its probably going to be Mozart and the gang.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

To make a mountain of Your life is just a choice But I never learned enough To listen to the voice that told me always love

for a solid 4-5 hours today i thought about mis-steps in my life, especially with people, things i'd like to make right -- on the myers briggs test, the last letter, based on my mood, i'm either a J (judgemental) or a P (perceptive).

Generally speaking, a more 'ideal human being' is a P. It means observing, cataloguing and all the other stuff that comes with action before thought. It constantly reminds me to think a situation through before making a snap judgement based on my ideology or prejudice.

this short amount of time out here at told me to look the other way in regards to what it petty, and get down to the heart of matters and see what needs renovation.

conflict, discontent, malcontent and other negative connotations don't advance agendas -- my personal agendas tell me to respect, respect, you have to show people respect.

the opportunity costs for negative emotions are enormous, as I get older I need to tear down those walls, all of them, and just let it flow --

its been a torturous day of sorts.

if music be the food of love, then play on

Since arrival -- no movies, but i plan on coming home with 52 music dvds --

they bring 2 hours of smiles to my week, and it kinda makes me feel like i'm travelling without travelling

week 1 - josh ritter Live in Dublin
week 2 - foo fighters live in london (my first bluray disk ever, i must say its impressive)
week 3 - nirvana mtv unplugged in new york
week 4 - springsteen in philly (i think) circa 1975
week 5 - jeff buckley grace tribute (live from all over the place)

see you in another 5 weeks with the next 5

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Make crosses from your lovers Throw roses in the rain Waste your summer praying in vain For a savior to rise from these streets

Two prevailing thoughts --

1 -- how a song morphs with your through life, thunder road by springsteen when i was a kid was a jam, in high school i liked the 'you're not a beauty but hey you're allright' lyric, and now there's another peel that comes off that onion, wow sprinsteen is the man -- that's what it takes to sell out stadiums, write timeless tunes like that

2 -- 'deep economy' the book i'm reading says, ok, you're rich, now what? it takes about the perpetual growth models we promote and their implications on society. analysis says 10k a year is the cutoff point for happiness, you make more, the happiness curve goes down.

a hammock and bare feet will come for me sooner than later, that's happiness -- hopefully the abstract notion of true love come true to boot

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

High on a hillside, trucks are loading everything's ready to roll I sleep in the daytime, I work in the nightime

Colbert is here in Baghdad this week, putting on some insane shows, giving away coveted army coins with the slogan 'heads we win, tales we win' -- The show goes on in front of a palace. Many would say this constitutes an 'America F*ck Yea' attitude as per Team America World Police. All pretty gutsy.

One thing Colbert said, something the account of, 'you guys are great, etc, some of yall have been here 4 or 5 tours, racking up frequent flier miles, enough for a free trip to Afghanistan.' -- Tonight, in the 'gang shower' complex I spoke with a gentleman who was here on his 4th tour. Ahhh, the human element that goes along with all this, families missing their wives and kids, makeups breakups bad moods ambiguity and most of all investment of precious time.

Today it struck me that I'm still sorta on 'leg one' of this marathon, I'd say mile 2 -- Many, or most rather have the 'freedom calculator' here, an excel spreadsheet that calculates to the second when they're able to go home.

Wow, days are hard, but they go relatively quick, relatively..

Sunday, June 07, 2009

tonight i'm gonna eat apples and cherries, fruit that reminds me of you, days i spent asleep in the orchard, reminds me of people like you

back to harping on the 'when you're a hammer, all you see is nails' routine ---

back home this is most prevalent in the bar scene. once i went out with a dental crew, i'm sitting in the corner talking to a lady about life while everyone is jammin' to the window to the wall and getting their groove on out there -- people hooking up see other people hooking up, hipsters see hipsters, so on and so forth.

army sees army, art sees art, music sees music, black sees black, white sees white, straight sees straight, gay sees gay, hardly little compromise.

I get about 15 - 20 minutes of american tv per day, fox to msnbc to cnn in the span of 15 minutes, and its all F*CK*NG GARBAGE. How can anyone watch ANY of that and take it with any grain of reality or relevance? Then its back to hammers seeing nails, people seeing and believing what they want to, so they don't have to think.

Saturday, June 06, 2009

if you want to play the prophet man you got to learn the lines...compassion

its funny watching the 'foreigners' here pick up American military tradition, especially at the chow hall when the individual slinging rice on your plate says 'here you go SIR' with potency.

prevailing currents of weather are interesting here, today was hot, but a relatively cool circular breeze was blowing.

times get long, i just have to keep in mind i'm running a marathon not a sprint --

Friday, June 05, 2009

with red lights flashign time to retire, and we turned the liquor store into a structure fire

today i began thinking about careers, and the relevance people put in them, and how they so much strive to be like the person or position above them, beside them, beyond them, and they let it dictate how they live their lives.

baseball players who can hit the curve ball out of the park get paid big bucks, those who can switch hit and hit breaking balls are the superstars.

bad part about the world we live in is people get all giddy when they hit a single or double, and expect a-rod dollars for it. its the time when everyone gets a trophy, and you're bound for promotion reguardless. -- that's always been the same.

i'd say what got me to baghdad was swinging at a slyder in the dirt on a 2 and 2 pitch and running out a base hit. not an ideal situation, not what i wanted to do when i was in the batters box waiting to hit, but i sure am glad that i got that base hit.

hell, i might even have a cramp from running out the throw, but next time i'm at the plate and the perfect pitch comes, its going yard, and that time's coming.

why? not sticking to convention, not posturing my life for the next slop on the totem pole, but by something completely different, something very rewarding.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Hope in the freedom he can almost touch, Folk take for granted as they walk to church

Thinking about the conflict in the middle east, I see two distinct tactics unfolding --

Two bullies back in middle school get in a fight,

1 -- they fight, beating each other up while everyone else is going 'woah', brutal, blah blah -- sometimes a whole brawl ensues, a free for all so to speak. at the end of it, the bullies at the least are all beat up, maybe even more, and then all go back to their places going damn, that shit hurt.

2 -- a principle gets in front of the bullies and says look, you ain't gonna fight.

The POTUS gave a speech today in Cairo, I wasn't able to see it, but a line that's been common through has been to focus on common interest, most reasonable minds in the middle east agree that violence isn't the way to roll.

Stats show (according to Newsweek) that G Dub and the boys killed 85% of the al qaeda, supposedly only 2-300 of those boogers left. Picking them out with the help of a moderate voice in Islam, which is most around here, is the way to do it.

Sure we could continue to do what Robin Williams said in 'Good Morning Vietnam' and say, 'Well sir, how do you know if they're the bad guy', 'Well we ask them, are you the bad guy? and if they say yes, we shoot em' -- but the transcendental approach is to refine the theocracries and academics.

Back to the bully analogy, there is some relevance to punching the bad guy in the face, the other bullies don't want to f*ck with you, however, both the strength and weakness of radical Islam is chaos and unorganization, and we're not dealing with bullies, we're dealing with weasels.

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Sailing heart-ships thru broken harbors Out on the waves in the night

At some point man invented the clock, driving a wedge between himself and god / nature.

Mathamatics led to currency lead to traders led to banks led to economics led to leverage, growth being the bottom line.

What happens when the market reaches 14k again, what about 28k -- It reminds me of something I read in a book recently about having 'enough.' When is 'enough' and what makes humans reach for the illusive dangling carrot, and what prevents their will power from holding back from the 50 inch tv?

So what is going to push humanity foward, past the age of consumption. The most powerful piece on the chess board is the queen, and I think the queen is going to push us to the next level. Queen = mother nature, and when I say she's going to push us to the next level, it means she's going to make the markets her b*tch.

It's happening now, first solar, etc, etc -- the markets will usher in the new age, only to be met with gradual irrevelance, don't ask me how' its going to happen, but that's my prediction. Could be her hiccuping us off the planet, could be us learning a little obedience and less arrogance.

Your perspective on the world doesn't change when you have money in your pocket, you're still the same ol' person you've always been, I think people often forget that point and frame everything around monetary policy.

I've been hitting the chess board again, I enjoy running through the scenerios, and during my 'library break' I play a brief game of risk, polishing up my attack, wait, fortification, strategy skills.

I often think about what it means the 'be in love' out here, as I see so many people missing their families, wives, kids -- I'm waiting for the shockers to bring back that fleeting feeling to my soul.

Like Toshi said today in an email, this kind of stuff helps your mind -- It doesn't need to get really any deeper than that, just something that frames reality in a different way -- I *think* its actually seeing the collective world for what it is, we see races of people that fight each other, to no end, for various reasons. Same reasons the dems fight the repubs, christians vs muslims, catholics vs protestants -- Before guns there were arrows, before arrows spears, before spears, clubs, so on and so forth.

It helps the mind by allowing you to focus on yourself, but not about yourself -- It helps you identify your place in the world.

I think about the fall of empires, french in indochina, brits in america, etc, etc throughout history, and the prevailing theme was a loss of financial sustainment. Sure these good willing fellas had the stay the course attitude, but to play a bad joke, when the lobster gives way to bread and water in the chow hall, and when the money stops flowing, history tells us we have a problem, despite and resolve one might have. With the money goes food and 'standard of living', time just has to lean a degree and game over, today, tomorrow, next year, 100 years, whatever.

Living 1,000 yards away from 5% or so of 5 million people who really really really don't like you, at all is a learning curve.